


Imp of the Perverted

by Isabeau_Gower



Category: Weiß Kreuz, Weiß Side B (Manga)
Genre: M/M, absent lovers, adult novelty stores
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-01-19
Updated: 2007-01-19
Packaged: 2017-11-19 02:57:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/568285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Isabeau_Gower/pseuds/Isabeau_Gower
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The title is a loose nod to Edgar Allen Poe's Imp of the Perverse and when the story is about Schuldig with too much time on his hands, the reasons are readily apparent.  Set, with the kind permission of the author, Nekojita, in her 'Other Side' universe, Schuldig is bored and lonely and his boss, Brad Crawford, has a miserable night full of portents and bad dreams.  Brad thinks he's set Schuldig's feet on the path of least damage, but what exactly will that come to mean before the day is done?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Imp of the Perverted

**Author's Note:**

> Weiss and its characters are the property of Takehito Koyasu. No infringement is intended and no profit is derived from this work of fanfiction.
> 
> This story is set in the 'Other Side' universe by kind permission of the series' author, Nekojita.

Brad Crawford woke in a cold sweat. He hated dreams like that, dreams that got mixed up with his talent. The truth was always contained within both potential futures that he would inevitably see, but the visions were also embellished with other things if they came to him while he was asleep. He couldn’t remember all of the details of his prescient nightmare and his sweat soaked sheets suddenly made him very glad of that fact, but he did remember an address that was associated in his mind with the better outcome of the two scenes.

Turning on his bedside lamp and reaching for his glasses, Crawford sought out paper and pen to write down the address and hoped that gesture would be enough to free his troubled mind and allow him to go back to sleep. There would be time enough in the morning to catch Schuldig and make certain that he got the note.

***

Cranky, irritable, grouchy, awakened on the wrong side of the bed; they all seemed to describe Schuldig this morning and yet they all fell short of the mark. Schuldig insisted that he was a changed man. His new relationships had changed and mellowed his personality, he asserted. Aya would grudgingly agree to some of that claim and Youji would scoff wholeheartedly, but Schu knew that he was right and mornings like this one proved his point. Today he woke up feeling positively evil.

Once upon a time, he woke feeling like this more days than not and while the urge still occasionally seized him, it had become rarer in the last two years. Both of his lovers were currently absent, sent off on an assignment without him, and while it wasn’t that separation alone that made him feel this way; he also knew that it wasn’t helping. Aya and Youji could frequently head off his bad moods before they went too far, but he was never certain what actually triggered them in the first place. Alone or together, drunk or sober, injured or well; there seemed to be no real pattern. All he knew was that some days he woke with a nearly uncontrollable urge to wage war on the world and that today was one of those days.

Schuldig walked to the closet and pulled out his old green jacket. “Oh yes,” he said to himself, “today is definitely one of those days.”

Brad set down his newspaper and watched as Schuldig stalked through the kitchen. Placing a cigarette between his lips, Schu looked at Brad as if defying him to object. When Brad picked up his mug instead of protesting, Schuldig raised an eyebrow and went about getting his own coffee.

“You’re in an agreeable mood this morning,” Schu said dryly as he sat in the chair next to his teammate.

“And you’re not,” Brad observed.

“No,” Schuldig agreed before touching the flame from a lighter to the cigarette’s tip. He indulged in two long drags before continuing. “I’m in a very foul mood this morning, as a matter of fact. Is there anyone that I could kill for you today? Anyone at all?”

Not really expecting an answer, Schuldig shifted his cigarette to his other hand so that he could sip at his coffee and so was caught off guard when Brad pulled a piece of paper out of his immaculately pressed suit jacket and slid it across the table.

“Seriously?! You have a hit for me?!” Schuldig looked down at the paper with a mixture of surprise and morbid excitement.

“Not exactly. It’s just the address of a place I want you to visit.”

“Visit? That’s a little vague, fearless leader. Do I get any more hints than that?”

Brad was never big on giving out too much information about his visions, but this time he couldn’t have complied even if he’d wanted to. “Just go, Schuldig. It’s the best possible choice for today for all of us.”

Feeling more than a little curious and needing to move, Schu picked up the paper and read the address. It matched the location of a store he had patronized before and an evil grin crept over his face. The day was improving.

When the grin expanded to a glint in Schuldig’s eyes and low, throaty chuckles of amusement escaped from the assassin, Brad wondered just what he might have unleashed on them all.

***

With several hours to kill before his objective would open for the day, Schuldig found various ways to amuse himself: the café with the rude waiter suddenly found itself with no customers, the music store was bombarded with special orders for the soundtrack from Xanadu, and the ice cream parlor sold nothing but plain vanilla cones to every customer who came in.

Schu gave himself a mental pat on the back for his unusually benevolent restraint, no doubt the result of Brad’s unwittingly generous little surprise, and walked toward his real objective for the day.

Breaking Dawn, Setting Moon was a discreet store in a well-heeled section of London and only the overemphasis of the gold letters beginning each word of the store’s name on the refined bronze plaque that was its business sign gave any indication of the trade practiced inside the respectable and elegant looking building.

A man in a well cut suit waited by a lone desk just inside the front door and stood ready to direct the genuine customers to the appropriate rooms and to send the idle curious back to the door. Schuldig was no stranger to BDSM’s secretary, however. As Schu walked by him to the stairs, ‘Mr. Smith’ smiled and nodded to his guest and watched as he took that stairs that lead up to the retail store rather than down to the private playrooms.

Climbing the stairs, Schu walked into the shop which was large and well stocked with the best in toys, books, videos, lubes, restraints, and other delights and had a creative sales staff ready to assist. If there was an object you desired and it was for sale, they would find a way to acquire it.

Schuldig strolled past rows of floggers and slings, racks of leather, and well lit display cases filled with an artful arrangement of glass dildos and butt plugs side by side with dangerous looking stainless steel medical implements.

A large glass double dong with green dichroic swirls inside caught his eye and made him think of Youji. It wasn’t a ring, but he suspected the blond would still appreciate the sentiment. Schuldig was a little miffed that he hadn’t been allowed to accompany his lovers to Paris on their errand, but he understood why. For now, Farfarello was in need of the kind of help only Schu could provide and Brad had promised that Aya and Youji would only be gone for one night. The bedroom just seemed empty without them there, and Schuldig smiled thinking how they could put his gifts to use in a very happy, very private homecoming. Now he simply needed to find something for Aya.

Schuldig wasn’t certain what he wanted for the fiery redhead so he wandered the store for an hour looking for just the right thing. With a crooked grin and a stifled laugh, he motioned for a sales clerk so that he could get a better look at his choice.

The anal speculum gleamed in stainless steel beauty and looked frightening to the uninitiated. It was, however, a relatively safe toy and perfect for his Aya. He liked to shock the man but never wanted to risk really hurting him. As hard as it had been to admit, Schuldig loved him too much for that. A little fear though, that was alright and it was to be expected where Schu’s toy collection was concerned. He had a reputation to maintain after all.

The clerk was just wrapping up his purchases when Schuldig felt a familiar mind enter the store. It was the man who had tried to pick up Aya in the bar, the one who worked for Krypton Brand, Chloe.

“Just when my day was starting to look up,” Schuldig muttered to himself. 

As he reached for his wallet, Schu dropped the note from Brad with BDSM’s address onto the counter and noticed that there was writing on the other side. Turning the paper over and examining it while the clerk ran his credit card, Schuldig saw that it was a slip for retrieving Brad’s newest suit from his tailor.

“He must have been in some hurry to write this down,” Schu thought. Brad was more of a formal memo kind of guy rather than a user of random scraps of paper, especially when said scraps contained appointments. Looking at the date and time, Schuldig smiled at the irony. Brad was due at the tailor today and less than an hour from now.

The clerk interrupted Schuldig’s musings and handed over the sales slip, his credit card, and his discreetly wrapped gifts. After signing the slip, Schu took his receipt and started to pull out his cell phone. Brad had done him a favor this morning by suggesting this trip and he was feeling generous. He would call and remind the man of his appointment on the slim chance that the anal retentive office supply addict didn’t have three other redundant reminders in various places already.

Before Schuldig punched the last number however, he cancelled the call and put the phone away while he stared at an unsuspecting Chloe. Schuldig had a better idea.

Weeks ago when they’d first run into the blond, Schuldig had joked to his lovers that the fashion plate on the make was just the thing for their overworked leader, who, frankly, desperately needed to get laid. Now Schuldig had a chance to do a good deed for a friend and an evil deed to a rival all at the same time. It was a perfect day after all.

It was all too easy to send the suggestion to a receptive Chloe who put down the leather pants he’d been contemplating and left the store for the prospect of a rendezvous with a sexy, well-dressed man he would meet at a certain tailor’s establishment. If Brad played his cards right tonight, he’d get to fuck a nice piece of ass and Schuldig would get a little extra privacy at the apartment to show off the gifts to his lovers when they returned.

With a little bounce in his step and whistling an obscene tune, Schuldig headed home well satisfied with his day of mischief. Sometimes, he thought, the Imp of the Perverse wasn’t such a bad thing, especially if he turned out to be an Imp of Perversion.


End file.
